Going on a date: a Woman
1. Starts to prepare in the morning.
2. Washes her head with shampoo and conditioner, curls it with hair curlers, then continues with tongs, applies styling gel and fixes the whole thing with a hair spray.
3. Puts on the first pair of tights - suntan-colored with extra glitter, then goes for black ones. Then she decides it would be better to put on stockings and a belt. Then it occurs to her that if she puts on stockings, he is bound to think that she is a nymphomaniac, and as a result decides on stylish white tights. After a certain time she recalls reading in a magazine that men do not like white tights, and in the end she puts on the tights she tried first.
4. Takes out all the contents of her wardrobe and decides for a long time whether that checked stylish miniskirt could go with the blouse presented by the previous lover, and with that soft V-neck with lilac specks. She flips through women's magazines for further info on that account.
5. Leaving for the date, she puts on blue make-up on one eye, and brown on another, and for a long time nags all the family which is better.
6. Put on perfume from a sex-shop, presented last year by a friend for Women's Day.
7. Puts on lipstick - first the color of the specks on the V-neck, then the color of the low-cut blouse, then the color of the lace underwear (in case she has to undress).
8. Covers the nails with 3 layers of varnish, with sparkles on the top, then decides that the color of varnish does not really go with the lipstick, and covers them anew - by a varnish that is two shades lighter.
9. Looks at the watch, which shows that she is already half an hour late. Putting on anything that is within reach, she heads for a taxi, full of highest hopes and heaviest doubts.
10. Before she leaves, she puts into her bag (just in case, of course) a condom with the scent of strawberries.
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